The Clintons went to Mexico.Mexico is a nice place. I've beenthere.
Hillary didn't climb the pyramidat Uxmal. She wore the wrong shoes.She left the right shoes back in theWhite House closet where she hid theRose Law Firm billing records.
Bill gave the nice Mexican drugdealers 73 helicopters. He didn'texplain it that way, of course. Hesaid he gave them to the Mexicangovernment to fight the drug war. ButMexico's recent Drug Czar was workingfor drug dealers. And Mexico has nowfired about 1200 employees of theirequivalent of the DEA. But this timethey'll be more careful who they hireto do the job, they said. Especiallynow that they have helicopters.
I used to date a girl named MariaLuisa who worked at the Ministry ofFinance in Mexico. The FinanceMinister would call her in and say,"Well, I guess they want to discusseurobonds at this meeting." "Yes, it'san important issue," she would say,noncommittally. She knew what hewanted. He wanted to know what aeurobond was. But he couldn't comeright out and ask. He was the Ministerof Finance, after all. Maria Luisaknew what eurobonds were. I explainedthem to her very carefully. But thenher boss became Foreign Minister, andhe didn't have to deal with difficultfinancial topics anymore.
Maria Luisa taught me the meaningof puto cabron pendejo. I likeSpanish. It's the only language I knowwhere you insult someone by callingthem a pubic hair. I recommend thatMexico put Raul Salinas in charge ofthe anti-drug operation. Why not? Itworked for Joseph Kennedy at theSecurities and Exchange Commission.
You know the drug war is a farcewhen the cocaine comes across theborder in tanker trucks. It's an opensecret, these days. Even the borderguards know which trucks have the coke.Someone has to forewarn them which onesnot to inspect. When they start bustingpeople, you'll know there's competitionamong the gangs. If the U.S. needshelp with the border, they should hirean expert. I recommend PeterVidenieks. He knows all about exports.
Bill went to Teotihuacan. MariaLuisa and I went there also. At thetop of the Pyramid of the Sun you canlook out over the surrounding valleyfor miles. It was today's equivalentof a good surveillance satellite. ThePyramid of the Sun is the biggestpyramid in the world, bigger thananything in Egypt. You don't needspecial shoes to climb to the top.Just stamina.
The drug operation at the Canadianborder with Montana and North Dakotais not nearly so efficient as the onewith Mexico. They have to fly thedrugs in by small planes. But they cutout the Mexican middleman, so maybeit's more profitable. Someone shouldask FBI agent Terry Nelson. I hear heknows all about drug profit margins.But perhaps he's too busy helping LouisFreeh find the mechanical failuresstashed aboard TWA 800. Louie saidcheck out the Honda and let the tankertruck go on by.
Some people say ex-Presidentialbrother Raul Salinas laundered $120million in bribes and drug money out ofMexico through Citibank to be depositedin Switzerland. Salinas has deniedthis. He said it was travel expenses,or something. Citibank is now afraidit will be hit with money-launderingcharges. It's already paid about $4million to defend itself, much of it infees to Robert Fiske.
Robert Fiske is the famous lawyerwho wrote a report proving that VinceFoster never laundered any moneythrough Ft. Marcy Park. So he shouldbe able to get Citibank off the hookalso. It was Fiske who representedClark Clifford and Robert Altman, whoran First American Bank in Washington,D.C., when it was illegally owned byBCCI. Back then some people claimedthat BCCI laundered money also. Well,Fiske set them straight. It's a goodthing lawyers specialize these days.
I was talking about the Calicartel with Chuck Hayes one day, whilehe was thumbing through the wiretransfer records of Raul Salinas. "Boythey've sure got Bill under theirthumb," he said. He was talking aboutour President Bill Clinton. But I'mpositive he was just joking. It's onlyin foreign countries like Mexico thatdrug cartels buy and sell politicians.In far away places like that, wherethey have strange customs.
But thinking of this reminded meof one of the many episodes edited outof the 60 Minutesdiscount hotels in Estoril tape. Leslie Stahlsaid to me: "You say President Clintonhas a serious cocaine habit." Ireplied: "Well, I haven't seen hismedical records myself. But I'vetalked to people who have seen them,and they say he has a serious cocainehabit." I eagerly waited to see thatexchange on TV. But Don Hewitt editedit out. I guess he didn't want tostart any rumors on the Internet.
Has Don Hewitt ever been toMexico, you think?
May 8, 1997
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